Thursday, December 13, 2012

Case of the hormones

I have been meaning to put this post up for a while now, sorry that I have been MIA things have been crazy! I told a couple of my friends about this story and they all thought it was funny enough that I should make sure to write it down for my own memories as well as to share with all of you.

As most of you know Tone and I are HUGE, and I do mean HUGE Halloween fans.  It is hands down our favorite Holiday of the year and we go all out with decorations every single year. It is literally so bad that we are known in our neighborhood as the "Halloween House".  This year was no exception even in my current state.  Typically we like to hit the "after Halloween sales" to get the best deals possible to add to our Halloween Hoard.  This year we decided that we didn't need to hit the day after sales since we now officially have 18 totes and 14 boxes (yep you read that right) but still needed to grab a couple of things.  So the Saturday after Halloween we hit up two places that we thought we could find what we were looking for. 

Our first stop was Meijer, for those of you out West, this is a rather large grocery store that also has clothes, home goods, etc in it, almost like a Super Target.   Upon our arrival we both determined that we needed to use the restroom facilities.  Meijer is one of those strange stores that their bathrooms are not technically located in the store, but in a transition area that is no longer "outside" but it also isn't inside of the store either.  We both part ways to our respective bathroom to take care of our "business".   Once I get done using the facility I walk out and don't see Tone standing in the transition area waiting for me.  I thought this was a little strange as I literally have never beaten him out of a restroom before; but especially thought it was strange since these days EVERYthing takes me at least twice as long to accomplish.  So I took a quick glance inside the store and didn't see him.  Which I thought meant he realized that he needed to take care of a little more business than originally anticipated.  Which, for those of you who know my husband well, this doesn't seem that outside of the realm of possibilities. 

Like a good wife I decided to continue to wait in the transition area for him so he didn't wonder where I was and worry once he got out of the restroom.  I waited.....I waited.....and I WAITED for him to come out and still nothing.  I begin to get a little worried so I do another quick look inside of the door of the store but still do not see him.  At some point I realize that I have seen about 10 men go in and out of the bathroom and still no sign of my darling husband.  So again, as the good wife, I begin to get a little worried about him, especially since it's been somewhere close to 10 minutes.  At this point I decide I should probably text him to see where he is at and then I wait....some more.  A couple minutes later I finally get a response which says "I'm in the store." 

Well...as I am sure you can imagine in my current hormonal state, this response did not sit very well with me.  So I proceed to stomp through the doors to get me into the store, and in the meantime I see him come around a corner.  This was enough to set me off completely, as not only was he in the store the entire time I was waiting for him, he was in an area that I couldn't even SEE him to know to come in.  Once I have him in my line of sight I proceed to yell at him....at the top of my lungs....in front of the greeter and anyone else who happened to be in my war path at that moment.  I believe the first words out of my mouth were "WHY didn't you wait for me?!?!?!?!" followed by "I have been standing out there in that filthy area for the past TEN minutes!!!" Not waiting for a response "I can't BELIEVE you didn't wait for me?!?!"  Again not waiting for a response "I waited for YOU, why didn't you allow me the same courtesy and wait for ME?!?!"

As you can imagine he didn't have a whole lot to say in response.  I am pretty sure it was wise of him not to say anything as at that moment in my seeing red hormonal state.  I don't think there was anything that he could have said that would have made any difference.  Once I had finished yelling I proceeded not to speak to him for the next 30 minutes.  He would ask me something and I would just grunt or give a one word answer in response.  I was still livid for quite a while.

After a while I started to see a little more clearly and definitely a lot less red, which made me get a little bit of perspective on the situation.   Much to my dismay, I realized once I was no longer looking at the world under a haze of red, that it really wasn't the end of the world that he didn't wait for me.  Did it still annoy me?  Yep.  Would I still yell at the top of my lungs at him in the middle of the store?  Nope.  Would I have waited for him, if the roles were reversed?  Of course.   Was I EVER going to admit I may have overreacted?  NEVER in a million years. 

Overall throughout my pregnancy I really have been so happy that even on my most uncomfortable days I really haven't been grouchy or mean.  But believe me, I have had a couple moments where the wrath of all these hormones have come to play.   So definitely don't feel too badly for Tone, he really hasn't had it too bad these past 8 months.  I just feel way too blessed to finally be in these shoes to ever feel anything but grateful.....just as long as you don't go into a store and not wait for me to come out of the bathroom.  ;-)

Tuesday, November 6, 2012

The Belly

I recently realized that though I had promised to put up a post that showcases the ever growing belly that I had yet to do it.  Though today's 27 week picture will not be part of this post, I thought I should do it before I had another "baby brain" attack and forgot. 


Week 12 
At this point I am just looking a little chubby, though I still was so excited about this little "bump"


Week 13
At this point I am wearing maternity clothes, COMPLETELY unnecessary I realize now but I do admit I was much more comfortable in these than my regular clothes


Week 14
At this point I really thought I was starting to show and look pregnant.  Looking back on them now I realize it looks like I just had a big burrito for lunch. 


Week 15
Not a huge fan of this picture of me.  But here it is definitely starting to become more apparent there MAY just be something other than a large burrito in there.


Week 16
Four months!! I think is the week were I had the most growth week over week, even to today. I remember how much relief I felt this week getting to the 4 month mark.  Made it seem like this was actually going to "happen" after all.


Week 17
This is babies first vacation, and Mom and Dad's last one just the two of us.  This was at our cabin at the Smoky Mountains in Tennessee.  Such a super fun trip, even if we didn't get to go on all the trails we wanted to because we had Lilly with us.  Turns out, for those of you who don't know, the black bears in TN will attack dogs so you can only take them on one "trail" in all of TN.


Week 18
This one looks like there has been a bunch of growth but I think it is more due to the fact I am standing closer to the mirror than I have in all the rest of my shots. 


Week 19
At this point I think there is really no more denying there is a baby in that belly of mine.  


Week 20
5 months!!  At this point I am starting to feel "pregnant", but man I am really enjoying it so much.  I am also feeling the butterflies, and popcorn popping on a fairly regular basis as well. 


Week 21
It was around this point that people started to openly ask me when I was due, vs. just staring at the belly and not daring to ask me.


Week 22
It's officially Halloween time at the Collura household, as you can tell from the vampire teeth and blood drops in the top left of the picture. 


Week 23
WOAH!!!  Who is that creeper with the beer in this picture?  Oh wait...that's just the baby daddy. I literally had no idea he was going to do this, and he jumped into the picture right before I took it.  I was laughing really hard in this picture, hence the red face.  haha.  You also get more of a look at the Halloween decorations that take over our house during this time of year. 


Week 24
6 months!!!  At this point I am definitely feeling pregnant but at the same time I feel so good that I find myself overdoing it a few times while working around the house.  Turns out that it's physically impossible to do the same level of work when you're also making a baby simultaneously.  It's a concept I have yet to fully grasp.  Really started to feel actual punches and kicks at this point, in the pregnancy.  They progressed so much that this was the week we could even start to SEE them as well.


Week 25
It was this night that I had a little bit of a "moment" when I realized just how big the belly was already, and how much time I still had left to go before Baby C's arrival.  I have since accepted the fact that I am just going to be huge, and there just isn't a whole lot I can do about it.  I am just still SO happy that I get the opportunity to get huge that it doesn't matter to me. 

Week 26
This is my last picture, as I haven't taken my 27 week picture yet today.  The belly is doing well and growing so much.  Yesterday I was snuggling down into the covers after the snooze button I quickly realized that sleep was no longer going to happen, as I was getting kicked and punched simultaneously for the first time.  It's amazing that even though I was exhausted at that moment, I would much rather feel those little kicks and punches than get another moment of sleep. 


Well there it is as promised, it's the evolution of the belly week over week.  It has come a long way, but I am sure it's going to go even farther over the next 91 days.  I can't wait to see what each week brings, and promise to do another update before the baby gets here.  

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

6 months!! Wait....WHAT?!?!?!

Technically I am officially 6 months and a week since I didn't get the opportunity to post last week due to Cardinal conference craziness.  Back to the 6 months factor...wow.  Last week was the first "milestone" that we had that made me say "wait....what?!?"  I am how far along?  How did that happen already? 

On one end I am SO excited and happy that things are moving along so quickly, as I truly can't wait to meet our little Baby C.  But on the other end I really don't want my pregnancy to come to end.  I am honestly really enjoying this experience so much.  I feel so lucky to be experiencing it in the first place, but the fact I have had such a great pregnancy so far has really, really helped.  Not to mention that our little peanut's movements have turned into full fledged punches and kicks in the last week or so.  They are so distinct now that you can sometimes SEE them.  So much fun!  I thought that I loved the butterflies, but wow...this has taken it to a whole other level.  Which has in turn taken my love for this little peanut to an even higher level than it was before.  Wow...just amazing I tell ya. 

Speaking of movements our little one decided that it was a good idea to wake Mommy up last Saturday morning at 7:45 by kicking her as much as possible until she decided it was time to get up and feed the little one.  While I wasn't so excited about the time that I was rolling out of bed (literally at this point), I loved every single moment of it.  Now don't get me wrong, I wasn't quite prepared for the fact that I am already getting my sleep interrupted by our little one, but man if that isn't the best feeling in the world I really don't know what is.  For those of you out of town, I have been trying very hard to get a video of it so I can send it to you.  It turns out, however, that Baby C seems to be a little camera shy.  As every single time I get the phone aimed right where I want it to be and push record, the little booger decides the better location to kick or punch Mommy is on the exact opposite side of my belly that the camera/phone is pointed.  So it may take me so time, but it is my mission to get you all at least one video of these kicks before this little one makes an arrival. 

Feeling these movements have really helped to calm my nerves and make me feel as though I can finally fully enjoy this experience and just let go.  Prior to these daily kicks (which I should note is happening as I type this because I am finishing up my lunch) I would get so worried if there would be a day or two without feeling this little one.  I think part of it is something that all of us "first time moms" go through while pregnant, but I also fully believe that a larger part of it is because I think I am trained after the last three years of disappointment that it probably means that something is wrong and I shouldn't allow myself to get excited or feel the true joy that I do right now.  It's a little sad, but so true.  I don't know how you can't feel that way, to be honest, coming from the place that we have.  All of it means, however, that we are just going to love this little one with every single ounce of our being and this baby is going to be the most wanted baby on the block.  

I am also VERY excited because we are getting all of our nursery furniture delivered this week!!  WOO HOO!  We are getting the crib on Thursday and everything else on Friday.  I can't wait!!  I have a feeling once we get everything set up it will be all that Tone can do to drag me out of there every single day.   I already go in there a few times a week and talk to the baby.  So I know once I get my comfy glider and have things to look at, it's going to be all that I want to do.  So if any of you ever can't find me, that would be the first place I would check.  I am also extra excited because now that we will have furniture that means I can start washing all of the clothes and blankets that we have so far and start to put them away.  OMG...I can only imagine how fun that is going to be!  I just can't wait till I get to fold my first piece of little teeny, tiny laundry and put it into a dresser drawer.  If I know me...I am probably going to cry.  ;-)

Our annual Halloween party is this Friday as well.  Which as all of you know, is a BIG deal in our house.  We literally start planning for this bad boy in August.  I can't wait to show everyone what our costumes are, and will be sure to post a picture for all of you to see next week.  It's really hard for me to believe that this is our last year as a twosome costume.  Next year we will have to figure out something for THREE!  :) 

Monday, October 8, 2012

Halfway there...

So I have been a bit of a slacker on getting up a new post the last couple of weeks.  Things have been pretty nutty here at work and once I get home as well.  So I apologize to any of you who are checking this on a weekly basis. 

We are officially halfway there...well actually now it's more than halfway there since, as of today, I am almost 23 weeks.  It's funny when I stop to think about the fact that in about 17 or so weeks that we are about to become parents I feel a little like I can't really wrap my head around it.  This is something that we have wanted/wished/hoped for, for so long that now that it's about to actually happen I find myself really not believing it.  But then again, how do you ever really come to terms with the fact that your entire life as you know it is about to change...and change dramatically.  Actually I am not sure that dramatically even begins to cover the depth of the change we are about to experience.  I think my brain is trying to find ways to reconcile this fact, but I just don't think I am there yet.  I have found myself thinking "hmmm...I wonder how much longer I will get to do this" while doing the simplest things.  Things that I take for granted every single day, such as:  a hot meal - last week I burnt my tongue pretty good on some super hot home made potato soup and found myself thinking I should probably enjoy that while it lasts; watching TV - for how much longer will a vast part (sadly) of my evening be spent on the couch next to my hubby watching our favorite shows, and which of those shows will "make the cut" once we have to start cutting back. 

Yep, as you can probably tell I think about all of this a little too much.  At the same time though, I don't know how you can help it.  Especially now our little one has started to really move around, to the point I feel movements every single day.  Such an amazing feeling, knowing there is a little life your creating moving around inside of you.  I can't wait to meet our baby, to find out if we're having a boy or a girl, who he/she looks like, to hold our angel in my arms for the first time, all of the wonderful things that come along with becoming a mom.  But then, admittedly a little bit of terror starts to kick in too.  "Am I going to be a good mom?"  "Am I REALLY going to know what to do that first sleepless night when I can't get the baby to stop crying?" "What if I really do have a 10lb baby?  Can I handle that?"  "OMG....I am going to be a MOM!"  "Someone is going to be entirely dependant on Tone and I"  "Wait...I know I have wanted this forever...but do I really have to give birth (see 10lb baby reference)".   Whew...it's a lot to take in, especially when I think about it all at once.  All in all though I can not wait until our little one gets here.  I am honestly truly enjoying being pregnant, but I am ready to meet Baby Collura too.

I have also noticed that I have started to get slightly obsessive, okay maybe full on obsessive about all things "baby".  I am finding myself preoccupied at work while thinking of something that I am sure we need to get done this week or it will be "too late".  I am not sure if this is the beginning stages of nesting, or just normal pregnancy crazy.  But it has started my friends.  I obsessed over child birthing classes until we booked one....two months in advance.  We are both obsessing over getting the nursery finished, and though Tone is the only one working on it (he won't let me assist) I am ready for it to be finished so we can start decorating.  I won't bore you all with the gory details, but let's just say the obsession is here and in full force. 

All in all at least once I day I still have to pinch myself to make sure I am not just dreaming this.  It all just seems to good to be true.  I honestly thought at this point that I would no longer feel this way, but now I have come to terms with the fact that this may be something I have to do until our little one gets here. I continue to feel great, and other than a few aches and pains here and there I really have zero complaints.  But honestly I think even if I was miserable I would still love every moment of it. 

I hope you all have a great week and will do my best to put up another post next week.  Especially since we will be at 6 months!!!

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

It's a.......

BABY!!!  We had our mid-pregnancy ultrasound today.  And yes, to the disappointment of some of you, we held strong and didn't find out what we are having; other than what appears to be a very happy healthy baby.  For us that is enough, we are just so excited to be in this spot in the first place all that matters is our babies health. 

I am pretty amazed at how much our little nugget has grown in the last 5 weeks.  To go from a mere 4 ounces all the way to 12 (aka a soda can) in that short amount of time is just astonishing to me.   Which I am sure means that I am in for some pretty big shocks over the next few months as this baby continues to grow like a little weed.  Especially since though I am just 19 weeks baby was measuring at over 20 weeks.  I guess I can thank my Mom and my good ol' Scandinavian heritage for that one.  I always knew that if I ever got lucky enough to have a baby of my own that I was destined for a large baby.  That's what happens when you were 10lbs 10oz and your great grandmother had a 14lb child.  My family doesn't have babies...we have toddlers.  ;-)

I have determined, there are truly no words to describe the feeling that you have seeing that little life growing inside of you.  It's one of those things that you know conceptually what is happening, but then to see that little person moving and growing inside of YOU is a whole other experience.  I really never knew how much I would grow to love going to the Dr. and staring at a TV or monitor for 45 minutes.  But man, my life literally has begun to revolve around these glimpses and appointments.  And wow, every time you see that baby the love that you feel just grows exponentially.  I am already overwhelmed with feelings of love for our child so I can't even imagine how much that feeling is going to intensify when I meet him/her for the very first time and hear that first cry.  I know all of you that are already Mom's are probably nodding and smiling thinking "oh she has no idea" as you read this.  I am sure I really don't...I just know I can't wait to experience it. 

Now on to the FUN stuff!  We got a few very fun pictures that I wanted to be sure to share.  I just have to say that I am PRETTY sure that Tone and are have made the cutest baby ever! 

Here is the ever necessary skull picture, I threw in the one with the labels to make it easier for everyone to figure out.  I really do find it odd that even this picture I think is adorable.  Pretty sure that means I have the "mom bug". 


Here is the profile picture.  It's a good thing our u/s tech grabbed this when she did.  As it turns out our baby may already be a little stubborn like Mom & Dad as shortly afterwards, proceeded to roll over and bury it's face as far away from the u/s wand as possible.   I just love how much you can see in this picture: the little heart, the brain and all it's different parts, the spine, etc.  SO amazing!!

The spine, and a better look at how much of an effort baby was putting into getting as far away from that annoying u/s wand as possible.  I was very relieved to hear the spine looks perfectly normal especially as we opted not to do any of the prenatal testing. 

And last but not least, the little leg, foot and cute little butt.  :)  To which my sweet husband immediately pointed out "I think the kid has my calves...those are huge!" I have determined that Tone seems to think that our baby is getting everything from him.  But in this case...I have to agree, those things ARE huge!!  Which I hope means we have a future little linebacker on our hands, or possibly a future Olympic sprinter or Volleyball player if we are having a girl. 

Hmm...well I think I promised this one was going to be shorter, but I am certain I didn't accomplish that goal.  Turns out I may just have a lot to say about our dear, sweet baby.  So I really hope you guys don't mind all the "babble", it appears I just can't help myself. 

Monday, September 10, 2012

It's finally happened, and everything else that has happend in the last 19 weeks

We are finally here...finally.  The thing we have been hoping, wishing and praying for the last three years has finally come true.  WE ARE GOING TO BE PARENTS!!!!  Granted, I realize all of you already know this, but since this is my first post I have to "catch-up" on the last 19 weeks of my life. 

I will remember the morning that we found out for the rest of my life.  It started out like a normal "having people over" Saturday morning.  Which means, my hubby was out of bed with a quickness at the crack of dawn so he can start his meat preparations.  See it was already a big day in our house, we were celebrating Tone's birthday...which also means he is allowed to make copious amounts of meat and his wife (the vegetarian) can't say anything.  Because I was feeling exhausted (little did I know why) and the idea of prepping meat at 5:00 in the morning on a Saturday didn't excite me all that much I stayed in bed until about 8:00.  We had decided the night before that it made sense for me to take a pregnancy test since I was "late" so far in June.  I honestly, hadn't really thought too much about it since it had happened before and we had started the adoption process.  So I had come to terms and was looking forward to becoming a mom on that path.  All of which meant I was certain I was just going to take another pregnancy test just to take one.   Now when I say that I have become to despise those little plastic things over the last three years, well that is literally an understatement.  Taking one of those had become to being equal in my mind to being force fed a rare steak, plucking out all of my eyelashes one by one, sliding down a banister of razor blades...well you get the idea.  Part of me was half convinced they really didn't work and it was just another ploy to get us women to spend money on something else.   So needless to say I was really not looking forward to the task ahead.  Long story short (and I will spare you the details) before I knew it...I looked down and the digital display said "pregnant".  I think I literally did a triple take before it set in what it said.  To which I immediately began to scream "OH MY GOD!!" over and over and over while running through the house, flinging my "pee stick" as I ran to find my hubby so we could share in this moment together. 

I didn't want to get rid of my "stick" after I saw it, I was so afraid that if I didn't stop staring at it, it wasn't going to still be real.  So I decided to take a picture of it, so I would have it to look at whenever I had a moment of disbelief (which there were plenty) over the next few weeks. Plus I decided it was a lot more sanitary to carry around a picture vs. the actual "stick".   It's hard to know you're pregnant when you're not sick (don't get me wrong I am NOT complaining) and are just overly emotional (which as you all know isn't all that unheard of for me), so it was nice to have this picture to fall back on.  I literally think this may have been my favorite picture, until I saw my nugget for the first time. 



Fast forward 3 excuciatingly long weeks to our first pre-natal appt.  I was SO nervous before and during the appt until I saw my little nugget.  I think it was mainly because we were so used to getting the rug pulled out from underneath us, there was a little voice in the back of my mind that was certain it was going to happen again.  It was so bad I was shaking (literally) and my blood pressure was 140/100 or something ridiculous like that.  After what seemed like three hours it was finally time to do the ultrasound.  I think I literally held my breath until I saw my little nugget for the first time, and then saw the heartbeat.  It was the cutest little alien I had ever seen in my entire life.  I immediately started crying and fell head over heels in love.  There it was, my proof there was a baby, that it may actually REALLY happen.   


Tell me...isn't that the cutest little "blob" you have ever seen! Or is it just me???  :)


Now was that dreaded 4 week wait until I was 12 weeks and officially in the "safe zone".  Talk about the longest 4 weeks of my entire life.  Now that I was finally pregnant all I wanted to do was shout it from the rooftops, and I had to keep it all locked up.  Which became increasingly difficult as each week went by as my clothes were getting tighter, and tighter and my "growing" secret was getting really hard to conceal.  I think it was pretty obvious by the time we started to spill the beans that I wasn't just getting chubby.   It was at our 12 week appt we got to hear the heartbeat for the first time.  Wow...how amazing is THAT?!?!?  I thought I loved my little nugget before...turns out nope..that little sound made me fall even harder for our baby.   

We then had to have another ultrasound the following week so I was able to see our baby again.  Which now looked more like an actual baby.  While we were watching the baby put on quite a show, there was playing with feet, a little thumb sucking, hands by the face, legs tucked under, and all other wonderful things that I was amazed to see someone that was just 4oz do.  And yep...you guessed it...I fell even harder.



Isn't that the CUTEST little profile...ever?!?!?

Now here I am pushing 19 weeks (tomorrow) and all is well.  Baby is growing like a weed and I have started to feel movements pretty regularly.  We are treating every single day as though it is the blessing that it is and I am loving every moment of this new chapter of our lives.  I honestly have been so fortunate with my pregnancy so far.  Other than some swelling...okay maybe a lot of swelling and a sore back I have felt so good (sorry Tiff).  But to be honest even if it had all been awful so far I would still love and cherish every single moment.  

I have my mid-pregnancy ultrasound on Wednesday and just can't wait to see my little nugget again.  I really don't have any idea how we are already almost halfway there, but I can't wait to get to the finish.  I can't wait to see what the next 4.5 or so months have to offer, and for the day that feeling our baby move is something that is a regular thing.  I will definitely post pictures after Wednesday and any videos that I can.  I will also go back through and find all of my belly pictures so far so you can all see how far I have come.  :)