So I have been a bit of a slacker on getting up a new post the last couple of weeks. Things have been pretty nutty here at work and once I get home as well. So I apologize to any of you who are checking this on a weekly basis.
We are officially halfway there...well actually now it's more than halfway there since, as of today, I am almost 23 weeks. It's funny when I stop to think about the fact that in about 17 or so weeks that we are about to become parents I feel a little like I can't really wrap my head around it. This is something that we have wanted/wished/hoped for, for so long that now that it's about to actually happen I find myself really not believing it. But then again, how do you ever really come to terms with the fact that your entire life as you know it is about to change...and change dramatically. Actually I am not sure that dramatically even begins to cover the depth of the change we are about to experience. I think my brain is trying to find ways to reconcile this fact, but I just don't think I am there yet. I have found myself thinking "hmmm...I wonder how much longer I will get to do this" while doing the simplest things. Things that I take for granted every single day, such as: a hot meal - last week I burnt my tongue pretty good on some super hot home made potato soup and found myself thinking I should probably enjoy that while it lasts; watching TV - for how much longer will a vast part (sadly) of my evening be spent on the couch next to my hubby watching our favorite shows, and which of those shows will "make the cut" once we have to start cutting back.
Yep, as you can probably tell I think about all of this a little too much. At the same time though, I don't know how you can help it. Especially now our little one has started to really move around, to the point I feel movements every single day. Such an amazing feeling, knowing there is a little life your creating moving around inside of you. I can't wait to meet our baby, to find out if we're having a boy or a girl, who he/she looks like, to hold our angel in my arms for the first time, all of the wonderful things that come along with becoming a mom. But then, admittedly a little bit of terror starts to kick in too. "Am I going to be a good mom?" "Am I REALLY going to know what to do that first sleepless night when I can't get the baby to stop crying?" "What if I really do have a 10lb baby? Can I handle that?" "OMG....I am going to be a MOM!" "Someone is going to be entirely dependant on Tone and I" "Wait...I know I have wanted this forever...but do I really have to give birth (see 10lb baby reference)". Whew...it's a lot to take in, especially when I think about it all at once. All in all though I can not wait until our little one gets here. I am honestly truly enjoying being pregnant, but I am ready to meet Baby Collura too.
I have also noticed that I have started to get slightly obsessive, okay maybe full on obsessive about all things "baby". I am finding myself preoccupied at work while thinking of something that I am sure we need to get done this week or it will be "too late". I am not sure if this is the beginning stages of nesting, or just normal pregnancy crazy. But it has started my friends. I obsessed over child birthing classes until we booked one....two months in advance. We are both obsessing over getting the nursery finished, and though Tone is the only one working on it (he won't let me assist) I am ready for it to be finished so we can start decorating. I won't bore you all with the gory details, but let's just say the obsession is here and in full force.
All in all at least once I day I still have to pinch myself to make sure I am not just dreaming this. It all just seems to good to be true. I honestly thought at this point that I would no longer feel this way, but now I have come to terms with the fact that this may be something I have to do until our little one gets here. I continue to feel great, and other than a few aches and pains here and there I really have zero complaints. But honestly I think even if I was miserable I would still love every moment of it.
I hope you all have a great week and will do my best to put up another post next week. Especially since we will be at 6 months!!!
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